“I’m So Smart” No. 8,973
In which I answer the pressing news questions of the day without even bothering to read the articles attached to the headlines.
Q) The economy is tanking. So why is Wal-Mart thriving?
A) Wal-Mart is thriving because when people start to feel the financial pinch, they’re more inclined to shop there even if they hate the place. (And who doesn’t?) Their stuff is cheap and, for the most part, the quality isn’t much different from what you’d get elsewhere.
Q) What’s wrong with the Bush and Clinton plans to suspend foreclosures?
A) It just puts off the inevitable and delays economic recovery. It’s like when you’ve got a sore covered by a band-aid. At some point after the bleeding has stopped and the thing has scabbed over, you know you’re going to have to rip that sucker off. Sure, it hurts — but it’s got to be done and, once it’s exposed to the air, the sore will heal more quickly.
Q) How do you build a public library in the age of Google?
A) You make it a center of learning — not just a repository of books. You make it a cultural center.
Q) How did we get hoodwinked into tolerating abusive interrogations?
A) We didn’t get hoodwinked into tolerating anything. There are a lot of factors at play in this whole issue. Part of it, of course, is plain old secrecy. I have no doubt that we’ve seen only the tip of the iceberg in terms of the terrible things our government has been doing. Fear-mongering: 9/11 scared the shit out of people and people who are frightened will sometimes act rashly. Ignorance: many people just don’t realize that torture is actually not an especially effective method for getting reliable information out of people. More ignorance: our educational system (including parents) doesn’t do a good job of teaching people how to think deeply about complex topics like morality. To a certain extent, our reliance on fast-paced media reinforces shallowness of thought. Sociological factors: Even people who are initially freaked out by the torture will put aside their discomfort when they observe that people around them aren’t alarmed. People in groups will do terrible things that they’d never do alone. Obedience to authority: people in strictly regimented authoritarian environments will do what they’re told to do — even when it may be something they find personally distasteful. In order to understand how this sort of thing happens, you need only consider Germany of the 1930s and 40s. The same kinds of psychological and sociological principles are at play everywhere and at all times.
Q) My boyfriend insists on roadtripping to his parents house every weekend. What can I do?
A) That’s just plain weird. Dump him.
Q) I’m about to pay way too much for a house, and I know it. Does that make me a fool?
A) Yes.
Q) Should Hillary Clinton drop out?
A) No. Not yet, at least. The longer she’s in, the better Obama looks to people. As she falls behind, her inner control freak becomes more apparent and her handlers resort to sleazier tactics. (They’re really not dong her any favors.) So… no. She should remain in the race a while longer to help more firmly cement Democratic and Independent support for Obama.
A) Well, I can only speak for myself (and for the millions of other truly intelligent voters), but I’ve had more than enough of “Papa’s” style of politics. We no longer live in the world of McCain’s youth. The Cold War is over. China is an economic powerhouse. It’s past time we let the people of the Middle East sort out their problems by themselves. Hard work and a willing spirit are rarely sufficient anymore for a person to make it big in this country. (Senator Obama himself is among the last of that breed.) McCain’s politics are the politics of the past. We need someone who can lead us into the future we all want. That’s a future where all Americans have a chance at a decent job, health care, and the opportunity for a good education. It’s a future where billions of dollars and thousands of young lives aren’t wasted in an unjust war. So, I guess it probably goes without saying that I much prefer the whiz kid.
Please. Give us the whiz kid.
Posted by RebeccaHartong on February 27, 2008 under Life
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